Reasons Men Like Being Men
1. Your last name stays put.
2. The garage is all yours.
3. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
4. Chocolate is just another snack.
5. You can wear a white shirt to a water park.
6. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
7. You donít give a ratís ass if someone notices your new haircut.
8. The world is your urinal.
9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
10. You never have to drive to another gas station because this oneís just too ďicky.Ē
11. Same work, more pay.
12. Wrinkles add character.
13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
14. If you retain water, itís in a canteen.
15. People never glance at your chest when youíre talking to them.
16. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
17. One mood, ALL the damn time.
18. And donít forget.. Phone Conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
19. You know stuff about tanks.
20. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
21. You can open all your own jars.
22. Dry cleaners and hair cutters donít rob you blind.
23. You can go to a public toilet without a support group.
24. You can leave the motel bed unmade.
25. You can kill your own food.
26. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
27. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.
28. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
29. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
30. Everything on your face stays its original color.
31. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passengerís seat.
32. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
33. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking: ďHe must be mad at me.Ē
34. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
35. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
36. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
37. You donít have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
38. You almost never have strap problems in public.
39. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
40. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
41. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
42. You can ďdoĒ your nails with a pocketknife.
43. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
44. Christmas shopping accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.