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Top 19 Things a Wife Won’t Say...

1. I’ll swallow it all . . . I love the taste.
2. Are you sure you’ve had enough to drink?
3. I’m bored. Let’s shave my pussy.
4. Shouldn’t you be down at the bar with your buddies?
5. That was a great fart Do another one.
6. I’ve decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
7. You’re so sexy when you’re hung over.
8. I’d rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
9. Let’s subscribe to Hustler.
10. Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?
11. Say, let’s go down to the mall so you can check out women’s asses.
12. I love it when you play golf on Sunday’s, I just wish you had time to play on Saturday too.
13. Honey.. our new neighbor’s daughter is sunbathing again, come see.
14. I know it’s a lot tighter back there but would you please try again?
15. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentine’s day thing and buy yourself new clubs.
16. Oh come on, what do ya say we get a good porno movie, a rack of beer, a few joints, and ‘I’ll invite my friend Heather over and we’ll have a threesome.
17. Christ, not the fucking mall again. Come on, let’s go to that new strip joint.
18. God.. if I don’t get to blow you soon, I swear I’m gonna bust.
19. I signed up for yoga so that I can get my ankles behind my head for ya...